Kidney Beans and Stinky Feet

I learned a very important lesson today - cooking kidney beans in a slow cooker can leave your house smelling like stinky feet.

Let me begin by saying I love my slow cooker.  WeeBee is a very self sufficient little boy, but by 4pm he has usually had enough and turns into a cranky, clingy barnacle.  Have you ever tried chopping onions while having your kneecaps taken out by a toddler?  How about draining hot pasta while being dragged away from the sink?  Anything that allows me to put a meal together at 9am when WeeBee is all sweetness and light and busy playing with trucks gets major points in my book.

Anyway, this morning was my first attempt at making what was essentially vegetarian chili.  As usual I had puttered around online comparing and combining recipes, and decided to use black beans and kidney beans.  Now, I'm not a big kidney bean person.  I refuse to eat them on their own, but I can tolerate them in something like chili, especially if there's melted cheese involved.  So I threw the beans and veggies in the slow cooker, turned it on, and went into the living room to do a crossword puzzle while WeeBee drew pictures.  About 20 minutes later, I started smelling something really...funky.  I went back into the kitchen, and sure enough, the stench was coming from my slow cooker - and it was definitely the kidney beans.

Now, as I said before, I do not have much experience cooking kidney beans.  I have no idea if they normally smell like stinky feet regardless of how you cook them, or if it was the slow cooker, or just me being special.  All I could think of, however, was the fact that this thing had to cook another 8 - 10 hours, and would presumably leave my house stinking to high heaven.  And if it stunk that badly, who knew how it would taste after all that...

Finally I gave up, and WeeBee and I went for a walk.  If dinner was ruined, it was ruined, but I sure wasn't going to stick around all day inhaling it.  Surprisingly, however, the house didn't smell nearly as bad when I returned.  I can only guess that the other ingredients had begun to break down, and their smell was combating that of the kidney beans.  Even more surprisingly, when it was finally done that evening, it tasted pretty good.  I would actually consider making it again - provided I could flee the house for a few hours while it was cooking.  All the same, I think I'll continue looking for a recipe that doesn't involve kidney beans...just to be safe.