And Your Target Audience Is What, Exactly?

I have always had an issue with Obama's "Yes We Can" slogan.  Anyone who has watched more than 3 minutes of Bob the Builder knows that they say it at least 5 or 6 times per episode.  Now, while later seasons of Bob appear to have him working in some sort of eco-friendly tree hugging utopia, he still has the most neurotic group of machines working for him.  That's fine for the toddler set - for politics, not so much.  Especially since the next line is always the crane (who is afraid of heights) saying "Um...yeah...I think so..." in a very trembly voice.  And really, what's next?  Mayor Bloomberg singing "This Is The Term That Doesn't End?"  Mayor Booker convincing us "It's A Beautiful Day In the Neighborhood?"  Can we go a little higher than children's television for inspiration here?

Anyway, fast forward to 5:45 this morning, when WeeBee putters into my room and decides to worm his way into the bed.  We put on the classical music station on the radio, hoping that he would fall asleep again, and at first it seemed like it was going to work.  Then at 6AM they cut to some news blurbs, including the fact that Obama had been in New York the previous day, ostensibly to honor some dead person that had connections to the U.N., but also to attend some fundraisers up in Harlem.  I don't recall the details - I just wanted to sleep.  Then they played a clip of Obama saying "Yes We Can."  Up pops WeeBee, wide awake, shouting "Bo Bo!  Bo Bo!" - his way of saying "Bob the Builder."

Good job, Obama...

I Need New Soup Ideas

WeeBee loves soup.  I've been making it more often now that I have a slow cooker, and freezing the leftovers, but I feel like I cycle through the same 3 or 4 recipes.  Pea soup is the easiest, and WeeBee's favorite - he actually asked for a second bowl yesterday.  I'm still trying to perfect my black bean soup recipe, and the infamous taco kidney bean stinky feet concoction.  And then there's lentil soup, which is slightly more time consuming, since the recipe I have involves chopping a ton of vegetables.

Unfortunately, WeeBee gets a horrible diaper rash from anything tomato based (although he can eat fresh tomatoes) so that knocks out a lot of recipes.  He also doesn't quite have the eye/hand/mouth coordination to handle broth, so anything like chicken noodle soup is out as well.  (He's far to independent to let Mommy feed him - we've tried.)  So I'm left looking for something the consistency of pea soup, but using other ingredients.  Only problem is, you can't exactly type "pea soup that is not pea soup" into google and expect much, so if anyone has any ideas, I'd love to hear them!  It doesn't have to be bland - we're talking about a child who likes olives, balsamic vinegar, and feta cheese.  Bonus points if it freezes well!

You Know That Line In The Bible...

Where Jesus says something to the effect of "Give unto Caesar that which is Caesar's, and give unto God that which is God's."

Somehow I don't think this is quite what He had in mind...

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/03/17/churchgoers-say-pastor-denied-communion-refused-hand-tax-refunds/

Because There's No Way This Could End Very, Very Badly...

Apparently when your team loses 101 games in a season, the next logical thing to do is give your fans bags of decaying waste.  I mean, at least then something might stink worse than you do.  Because it would never occur to your fans to start throwing it at you.  And it's not painful enough to sit through 101 losses, without some rotting vegetation and hot dogs to keep you company...

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2014563757_greenteams22m.html

Really, people?  Really?

This Is Good!

That's what WeeBee told me tonight while he was eating black bean soup for dinner.  Only he says it with a weird German accent, (no idea why) so it sounds like "Dis is goot!"  Either way, it made me smile.  Unfortunately he thinks repeatedly sneaking back into my room after bedtime with a teddy bear under each arm and standing at my elbow is equally adorable.  Which, in a way, it is, but I wish he didn't know that...

Time For Our Weekly Crazy News Article

The moral of this story, boys and girls, is if you are going to create an alias, put some thought into it...

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2011/03/23/2011-03-23_13_illegal_immigrants_named_perez_try_to_sneak_into_united_states.html

I mean, there are worse ways to try to sneak into the country than by wearing a Marine uniform.  But I would think doctoring license plates is pretty high up on the list of "basic things one should know how to do" when running such an organization.  And if you're going to cut corners on that, at least come up with different names - because 13 Marines named Perez in one van doesn't look suspicious at all...

WeeBee vs. Italian Ice

So what with today being the real first day of Spring and all, Rita's Italian Ices was doing a promotion where you could come in and get a free regular sized ice.  Not being one to pass up free food, I took WeeBee along with me.  I got him the lemonade ice, (figuring that if he dropped it, at least it wouldn't stain), and then got myself a strawberry banana one.  WeeBee was insanely excited about it, and loved sitting on the bench outside the store and shouting "Hiiiii!" to everyone who walked by.

Well, he was about 1/3 of the way through his ice when he looked up at me with this adorably hurt and confused look on his face, whimpered "Mammaaaa," and keeled over face first into my lap.  Poor little guy had an ice cream headache/brain freeze.  It didn't last long, but he refused to finish his ice after that.  Every time I offered it to him he'd grab his head and say "Nooooo."

Apparently my ice was ok, though, especially after he discovered there were little chunks of banana in it.  So we swapped and order was restored to the universe.

Now if only this would teach him to stop inhaling his food like there's no tomorrow...

If You're Bored and Want to See a Train Wreck

Watch WPIX/Channel 11 news at 10.

I listen to the news on the radio more often than I watch it on tv.  If I'm flipping channels and it happens to be on, or if I want more details on something I might watch it, but I don't sit down religiously and tune in.  So I was rather surprised a few weeks back when I came across Channel 11's news at 10, and the format had been completely changed.

To be honest, I thought the station was bordering on bankruptcy.  There is no news desk for the anchors.  In fact, there is only one anchor, and she bops around the room at random.  It looks like the studio is a spare room they rented in a basement.  You can see the cubicles of other people working there, doing...well, I'm not quite sure what they're doing on the computer.  There's no sports highlight reel.  Kaity Tong has been banished to standing by some river, giving news stories from there.  Poor Mr. G has a weather map that is one step up from a Kindergarten classroom's, where you get to stick clouds or the sun or a lightning bolt on the day of the week, and dress up the teddy bear in weather appropriate clothing.  In short, my high school's news club looked like they had a higher budget than WPIX.

So the other day, out of curiosity, I did a little research online.  It turns out all of this happened last fall, in an attempt to reach out to younger audiences.  Unfortunately, somewhere along the line someone confused "streamlined" with "looking like we got robbed and all our equipment is gone."

I get that they want to bring in new viewers, and if you can get 20somethings hooked now, you've got them for the next 70 years, for argument's sake.  And I get that people like things instantly on their phones and computers and all that.  But is it really too much to ask for a newscast to look like a newscast?

Spring Is Officially Here!

I broke out my flip-flops today!

Yes, I know it's technically the 18th, and the powers that be do not count "first day one can comfortably wear flip-flops outdoors" as the beginning of Spring.  But I do, and it made me happy.  Granted, I take flip-flop wearing to the extreme (March - November) and it is probably in part due to my residence in the land of mismatched socks.  But after the winter we had, I had resigned myself to my flip-flops not seeing the light of day until sometime in June...which made today even better.  :)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Hope you all enjoyed your St. Patrick's Day!  We did the whole corned beef/cabbage/potato thing here - well, technically, I made it all yesterday in the slow cooker.  I haven't decided if I'll do it that way again.  Corned beef is one of those things that tastes better the second day, but I still feel like something was missing.  Maybe next time I'll cook the potatoes and cabbage separately and see if they hold their flavor better.  I have a stockpile of corned beef in my freezer right now since it was so cheap this past week, so I'll have my recipe perfected by next year.  :)

At least I finally got my soda bread to taste right.  Normally I don't have a problem with baking, but for some reason I always have issues with scones and soda bread.  They always seem to cook too quickly on the outside and still be doughy on the inside, which completely grosses me out.  This year I switched to a really basic recipe and it came out fine.  Unfortunately, WeeBee didn't understand why he couldn't eat it right after it came out of the oven, and I had to hide it.  I'm doomed once he's tall enough to see all of the counter - that child has food radar...

I Want to Get Paid to Come Up With This Silliness...

It's nice to know that with the economy in the state that it is, the University of Illinois still has money to blow on this silliness...

http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2011/03/16/134600344/seniors-have-trouble-walking-and-talking-at-the-same-time

Ok, I get that whatever department was responsible for this probably has a budget that they have to use or lose.  But they seriously couldn't come up with a research project that could tell us something we don't already know?  What's next?  More people eat chocolate on Valentine's Day than on the 4th of July?  More people go to the beach on a sunny day than when it's raining?

And if this was the proposal that actually got the funding, what were the ones that didn't make the cut?

Ice Cream Awesomeness

Well, for those of you were wondering, 45 minutes and a bumped head later, WeeBee did end up falling asleep in his toddler bed.  Unfortunately, WeeBee learned the hard way that when one sprints headlong into furniture (in this case, the glider's ottoman) and then a door, one does not walk away unscathed.  The "experts" say that when your child insists on getting up repeatedly from their bed, you should walk them back into their room silently and put them back in bed.  What they don't point out is that your child will probably find it just as entertaining whether you're silent or screaming like a lunatic.  It got to the point where I just needed to turn in the direction of his little footsteps and he'd run back into his room, shrieking with laughter.  Which was all well and good until he overshot his bed, crashed into the ottoman, and then the door on his way back out in the midst of his hysterics.  Daddy then came to the rescue with a sippy cup of water, and WeeBee evidently decided that all this running around was more trouble than it was worth.

On a purely happy note, I got a half gallon of Blue Bunny Bunny Tracks ice cream for 88 cents today.  Hurray for A&P sales and $1 off coupons!  I haven't had Bunny Tracks in years, but I'm happy to report that it was every bit as good as I had remembered it.  (I love when that happens.)  So go do a google search for the coupon and see if your A&P/Waldbaums has it on sale too!  It's totally worth it.  Unless you're allergic to nuts - then go get yourself a different flavor.  I'm not responsible if you don't read the label first in your mad rush to get your ice cream fix...

Toddler Beds, Almost Setting Your Dishwasher on Fire, and How to Clean a Coffee Pot

Or a typical day in the life of Annie...

So the epic battle of WeeBee vs. toddler bed continues.  He likes the idea of the bed.  He loves to jump into it and get tucked in.  He just doesn't believe in staying there.  The problem is, he doesn't want to be held until he falls asleep either.  I've been spoiled by having him in the crib - nine days out of ten I could put him in there after a bedtime story and he'd fall asleep on his own.  Now he wants to pull out his toys, play with the door, read story books in the dark, and knock on the wall.  I'm guessing that if I walk him back into his room enough times he'll eventually get bored, but then again, who knows.

On to more exciting things...I thought I set my dishwasher on fire today!  I had finished loading it up with the breakfast dishes and turned it on this morning as usual.  A little while later I went back into the kitchen and I thought I could smell something odd.  (Contrary to what this blog implies so far, my house does not always smell funky!)  At first I thought it was rotten food, which didn't make sense as I had taken the garbage out that morning.  Then it started to smell more like something burning, but I didn't have any appliances on besides the dishwasher.  Naturally I started having visions of opening it up to find melted plastic all over the place, even though I hadn't put anything out of the ordinary in there.

As it had reached the dry setting by this point, and there wasn't actually any smoke spewing out, I decided to go ahead and open it.  Everything looked normal, but the burnt smell was definitely coming from there.  Of course, as I'm trying to get a better look, WeeBee keeps trying to pull out the rack and grab utensils and just generally confuse matters further.  Finally, I discovered the culprit - a piece of fish skin.

I'm not an authority on dishwasher parts, but this particular model has a coil that runs along the base - I'm assuming it must release heat for the dry setting.  The other night we had fish for dinner, and when I had stacked the plates a piece of fish skin must have gotten stuck on the bottom side of one of them.  When I loaded the dishwasher I never noticed it was still there, and at some point it fell onto this coil.  Fast forward to the dry setting, when the coil starts to heat up, and you have recooked fish skin!  Which, in case you were wondering, smells even worse than slow-cooked kidney beans.  I got as much of it off as I could, but I'm going to have to take another look later - it was rather difficult to do while WeeBee was investigating.

On a good note, I figured out how to get most of the stains off my coffee pot, just by using salt!  After three and a half years, no matter how much I washed it with soap and water, it still looked sort of grungy.  I had looked online for ideas, but everything seemed either way to time consuming or I had tried it already.  Then  I remembered hearing that you could get tea stains out of a mug by using salt, and although I couldn't remember the exact details, I figured it was worth seeing if the same worked with coffee.  I sprinkled salt on the bottom of the pot, ran 10 cups of hot water through the machine, and let it sit there until it was cool enough for me to handle.  Then I poured about half the water out, added a little more salt, and set to work with a regular kitchen sponge.  Two minutes later, I had a sparkly coffee pot again!  There are one or two spots that I think are beyond all hope, but other than that, it looks brand new.  So at least one thing went right today.  :)

Floating Restaurant vs. Chuck Norris

So I found this gem of an article last night...

http://www.pennlive.com/midstate/index.ssf/2011/03/83_rescued_from_kentucky_resta.html

Now, in the midst of all this craziness, three things stand out...

1. Snorkeling gear passes for upscale restaurant attire in Kentucky.  Why one would have snorkeling gear easily accessible in March when living in a landlocked state is a whole other issue.
2. They didn't lose power - which is more than I can say for where I live when it rains.
3. And most importantly, Chuck Norris is a fire chief in Covington, Kentucky!

Kidney Beans and Stinky Feet

I learned a very important lesson today - cooking kidney beans in a slow cooker can leave your house smelling like stinky feet.

Let me begin by saying I love my slow cooker.  WeeBee is a very self sufficient little boy, but by 4pm he has usually had enough and turns into a cranky, clingy barnacle.  Have you ever tried chopping onions while having your kneecaps taken out by a toddler?  How about draining hot pasta while being dragged away from the sink?  Anything that allows me to put a meal together at 9am when WeeBee is all sweetness and light and busy playing with trucks gets major points in my book.

Anyway, this morning was my first attempt at making what was essentially vegetarian chili.  As usual I had puttered around online comparing and combining recipes, and decided to use black beans and kidney beans.  Now, I'm not a big kidney bean person.  I refuse to eat them on their own, but I can tolerate them in something like chili, especially if there's melted cheese involved.  So I threw the beans and veggies in the slow cooker, turned it on, and went into the living room to do a crossword puzzle while WeeBee drew pictures.  About 20 minutes later, I started smelling something really...funky.  I went back into the kitchen, and sure enough, the stench was coming from my slow cooker - and it was definitely the kidney beans.

Now, as I said before, I do not have much experience cooking kidney beans.  I have no idea if they normally smell like stinky feet regardless of how you cook them, or if it was the slow cooker, or just me being special.  All I could think of, however, was the fact that this thing had to cook another 8 - 10 hours, and would presumably leave my house stinking to high heaven.  And if it stunk that badly, who knew how it would taste after all that...

Finally I gave up, and WeeBee and I went for a walk.  If dinner was ruined, it was ruined, but I sure wasn't going to stick around all day inhaling it.  Surprisingly, however, the house didn't smell nearly as bad when I returned.  I can only guess that the other ingredients had begun to break down, and their smell was combating that of the kidney beans.  Even more surprisingly, when it was finally done that evening, it tasted pretty good.  I would actually consider making it again - provided I could flee the house for a few hours while it was cooking.  All the same, I think I'll continue looking for a recipe that doesn't involve kidney beans...just to be safe.

Where to Begin?

Well, after a week of lurking, I've finally gone ahead and started my own blog.  One would think this wouldn't be terribly difficult for a former English major, but years of having "write what you know" drilled into my head has left me a bit hesitant.  I always thought of blogs as having some grand theme - crafts, sports, family, whatever.  In all honesty, I couldn't think of any topic that I could continue writing about for an extended period of time while holding anyone else's interest.  I mean, I think WeeBee is the most adorable little boy in the world, but then again, I'm his mommy.  I enjoy knitting, but I'm limited to scarves and blankets.  I love to cook, but I can never guarantee having the time to pull out a camera and document my adventures.  I'm happiest sitting down with a book and a cup of tea, but that rarely happens these days.  And as my blog's title implies,  housekeeping is not my strong point.

So instead, this will just be a blog of my observations - things that happen to me, weird stuff on the news, and the occasional cooking success story.  I'm not sure if that makes it any more interesting, but we all have to start somewhere.  I hope you enjoy it.